Post-mortem of a weekend out and about
As I’ve pretty much spent the last year or so hiding away or limiting my social contact to a small group of loved and trusted friends, I am determined to learn to ‘go out’. It doesn’t matter if it’s with people or by myself. This weekend was the perfect opportunity to see if I’m making progress. I decided to not unleash the power of the pickup lines at this point - I am still collecting those for my social experiment.Friday night I was sharing a pizza with a friend at a local bar which had a great vibe and a clientele that was older, educated and intelligent. As we left I noticed two women come in. I smiled at them as I normally do, and they smiled back. And then turned to smile again after we’d passed. Did I actually pause and talk? Nope. It was a huge missed opportunity. But I was with my friend.I then headed to one of my local neighbourhood bars where I sat savouring a particularly fine tequila. Two attractive women came and sat next to me. “What are you drinking?” one asked... and the conversation flowed. They were out celebrating the birthday of one of them. Important Tip: when you as a male are asked by a female “How old do you think I am?” the answer is never “28”.What then is the safe and correct answer? I had a brief discussion via Twitter later. Is it seven years less than what you think? Is it “21” - said in such a way that you think they’re 19, but way too classy to be a teenager still?And that leads to a further thought: is it actually creepy for me to be talking to women in their early 20’s, where the conversation may lead to other pastimes? I’ve had some suggest that I should be looking for a woman in her mid-30’s. Others suggest “half my age plus seven” is the magic number - that would be 27+. What are your thoughts? I’m leaning towards the idea that women choose their mates and if an attractive 23-24 year old wanted to spend time with me, then it would be rude not to. It’s a moot point so far, but I don’t want to be in a position where I kill the possibility because I’m overthinking.Saturday was Halloween night in the bars. I had fun watching macabre make-up being applied by @LouDxx and talking to the bar staff (highly attractive dead nurses - very happy place) and others. It was interesting seeing how people in costume engaged differently from those not. Hiding behind a persona was really quite freeing I think. What was really cool to discover is that I had no problem starting conversations.I spent the rest of the night with another friend so didn’t really talk to anyone else.Here’s something I’ve discovered about me this weekend. If I’m out with a friend with the purpose to spend time with them, I don’t talk to others. Is this weird?So my question: If I’m out with you (my friend), would it be rude if I met someone, talked to them and then left with them? What is the unwritten rule?Simon.