Encouragement from the ladies

I have a semi-regular Friday night gathering, hanging out with my Cougars over a wine and bad TV. These are wonderful women in their late 30's and early 40's. For the most part with kids, and no longer attached to their menfolk.I love getting their perspectives and insights. Apparently men are bastards. Well, except for me. As they say.They're very encouraging in their words to me. And it occurred to me that I have many many women in my various circles and they all say similar things.For example. "Oh Simon, you are such a catch."I have heard this a lot. And when an attractive and available woman says it to me, it makes me feel good until I discern the unspoken "…except not for me, ok? thanks."Hmm. OK I'll take that. Thanks for the compliment.. But seriously, you're quite hot and I'd love to spend some 'beyond being a male BFF' time with you. How do I get there?There are other things have I been told, things that are encouraging and yet somewhat disappointing. And yes, I have been told these!!"you're so kind, you're just like a brother to me."Ouch. Unless you have a somewhat frowned-upon relationship with your brother, this is not good for my future prospects with you. It's nice that you seem to enjoy a strong fraternal bond, but you're pretty. And I would very much like to kiss you a little bit? Can you stop with the 'brother' thing?"I feel I can tell you anything - in fact I've told you things only my Dad knows".Right. Awesome. Daddy issues. It's nice that you trust me, but I guess that since you've told me EVERYTHING about you, I'm not getting any. Thanks for that."Are you SURE you're not gay?"OH COME ON!! So I like to cook, get my hair done at an expensive stylists, pay attention to gossip magazines, and like to look groomed. So I enjoy Glee, but I'm not really a fan of Show Tunes. And yes, I DO enjoy shopping and supermarkets and literature and theatre - but doesn't everybody?"You're safe and protect-ory".SHIT. I can be dangerous and alluring.. really I can… Wait a bit whilst I ask Google why boys that are risky and callous are attractive to women,  'cos it really makes no sense to me whatsoever! And If I am safe, why not let me hold you ever so close, and see where it goes… ;-)"Men with kids are really attractive".Actually this one is pretty cool. I adore my kids and they absolutely take priority. So I'll spend time with them knowing that at that moment I am pretty much irresistible. But is it morally wrong to use your kids as the most potent lure for women ever discovered?So attractive available ladies, if you're shopping in New World and see me with kids in tow, a banana bunch oriented with end-points upright and an iPad in full sight - RUN! You will be sucked in to the perfect storm of attraction and you'll have NO chance to resist my charms.Simon.