Of Why Orchids Are Better Than Puppies

I kill plants.Which is a little odd and perhaps a little sad, since I actually enjoy gardening. That being said, there isn’t a lot of opportunity to garden in a South-facing apartment. But I still manage to kill the plants that come into my life.Of all my attempts, parsley appears to grow OK. I am looking for other things that like no direct sun whatsoever.Anyway back to the subject.I bought an Orchid today. I really like Orchids. Always have. There is something very appealing about these plants.Orchids look good. OK, puppies look good but little dogs grow into big dogs and can lose their appealSo. Here's a short list of reasons Orchids are better than puppies. I may add to these!Orchids don’t need much watering. In fact, during Winter, you only feed them once per week. Puppies tend to get sad if they’re fed once per week.Orchids do not pee in the corner. Puppies do.Orchids do not drop fur. Puppies do.Orchids do not chew furniture or shoes. Puppies do.Orchids do not grow up to be stupid. Puppies do.I had a puppy once. It didn’t understand how to play Fetch. It couldn’t walk on vinyl floors. It really didn’t have a very big brain and was clearly a little in-bred.Orchids don’t need to be taken for walks even when it’s raining. Puppies do.Orchids do not run all over the house with muddy paws (Thanks Wendy!). Puppies do.It has been suggested that Orchids do not give you the big adoring welcome when you get home that puppies do (thanks Kath!). Well, they DO! (In their own special way!).I hope I have presented my case well. But to make things alright, here’s a picture of a puppy.- S.